Wrist slaps incoming!
Wait, you mean there’s a possibility they didn’t?
So you’re saying there’s a chance?
Jim Carey Intensifies
James Eugene Carrey intensifies even further.
And without Doge being mentioned, they’re clearly not taking credit for finding it.
… And I guess we know why the CEO stepped down.
Ohhh that’s the “personal reasons” the latest CEO quit over
Cashed out while the going was good. No honor among thieves and murderers.
“Company’s stock has declined over financial performance and sudden replacement of CEO”
Oh yes, what a mystery! I wonder why that Brian Thompson was replaced… oh yes! He went on an indefinite medical leave! He had a mineral deficiency, notably lead, and after receiving a few choice pills with a fast release system he decided to take a warm mud bath, then he got so relaxed he sank in and has never been seen again.
Luigi’s Mansione
The healthcare-fraud unit of the Justice Department’s criminal division is overseeing the investigation, the people said, and it has been an active probe since at least last summer.
While the exact nature of the potential criminal allegations against UnitedHealth is unclear, the people said the federal investigation is focusing on the company’s Medicare Advantage business practices.
UnitedHealth didn’t respond to written questions Wednesday. A DOJ spokesman declined to comment.
The probe adds to a list of government inquiries into the company, including investigations of potential antitrust violations and a civil investigation of its Medicare billing practices, including at its doctors offices.
Breaking: Trump dissolved the healthcare-fraud unit over DEI policies.
As you put these quotes side by side, I grew less convinced by what’s told in the article. Two quotes are sourced by what ‘people said’, the third one is an inquiry that led to nothing and the forth is a conclusion based on all these, WSJ isn’t the shining beacon of journalism, but what the hell lol.
Pre-Bezos it was, but the darkness is taking over now.
The investigation will stop as soon as Trump receives a
bribetribute from UHG.New trump tower donation
The fact this comment is so low means one of three things:
- A shocking amount of /c/news readers have a subscription to The Wall Street Journal
- A shocking amount of /c/news readers interact in the comments without reading the article first
- A shocking amount of /c/news readers already know you can use archive.today to bypass paywalls (based tbh)
It’s number two
Wait, we still generally prosecute crimes?
LoL, no.
The tough-on-crime people should really be pushing for the death penalty here.
We already got that. We just don’t think it should stop there.
Just buy some meal at Mar A Lago and it will be fine
The fart 💨 of the meal
United Health Care blaming any criminal activity on the dead CEO in 3…2…1…
If they do that wouldn’t Luigi be able to use that information for his defense?
I really want the Mangione jury to nullify. But unfortunately, they’re not going to.
Because the prosecution has no case and it’s obvious Luigi didn’t do it.
Even if they find anything they won’t DO anything.
Same old, same old. Call me when democracy wakes up.
I think we gotta take it back.
This just means either the guy who retired or the new CEO will become governor and then senator from Florida like Rick Scott.
